I met a job-seeker who has been in NZ for the last few months and in our meeting he was constantly complaining about the employment market, recruiters, job boards and his agent from his home country. He was frustrated about his job application rejections besides the fact that he felt he had the required relevant experience. He asked me, “Is that right on how I am being treated in NZ job market?” in a tone that he was the victim of wrongdoing.
I tried to explain him that key question wasn’t whether it’s right or not, although one would tend to agree with him in principle. The key question is what are you doing about it?
“Are you playing victim or are you adapting?” I asked him, “if you’re being robbed, you don’t just sit around thinking…Oh, why is this happening to me? Why me? This is not right. Instead, you react. You shout for help or you fight to defend or you call a cop or you run away…right?”
Constructive action / adaptation is opposite to sulking as a victim. Yes, the key question is what are you doing about it? I know it’s a question that sounds harsh especially to someone who was expecting me to empathise with his already troubled life. He tried answering my question for some time before retreating back to where he came from…never to be seen again!!
This has left me thinking…Why do we do it in the first place? Why do we want to come across as victims? Are we expecting undue favours? Consciously or subconsciously are we trying to manipulate others or are we simply trying to hide our incapability?
Also what comes to mind are those reality TV shows, something like a signing or a dancing competition, if the participant comes from a difficult / broken personal background they tend to attract more attention than they deserve. In some form or the other we see participants playing a victims’ card often gain short-term undue advantage.
Reason could be any of the above or something that I’ve missed but as a mentor I am observing the job-seekers irrespective of their colour, creed and nationality (including Kiwis) playing the victim card with no hesitation what-so-ever. Almost 7 out of 10 job-seekers are speaking this language and are behaving in way that they are the victims of wrongdoing.
Yes, I agree that the job market is hostile for many reasons beyond our control and no I am not saying that job-seekers are faking their stories and experience in dealing with their current employment struggles. My question is simple: What are you doing about it?
Remember, the feeling of being victimised leaves you with action paralyses. You stop thinking, stop improving and stop upskilling yourself. Your dependence on others increase. You become vulnerable and prone to exploitation. You start developing hatred towards situations and people around you and before you realise you are surrounded by negative emotions and negative people.
Just go out there, get up and do something. There are so many free resources and so much help available out there. Don’t be scared of hit and trial, feel free to experiment. See what works for you and what doesn’t. Ask for help / assistance / suggestions / guidance. Be an up-beat always. Keep that smile on your face and do not lose your confidence and faith on who you are and what you are capable of.
Never EVER... come across as a victim…..NEVER!!!
Like us on our recently created social media pages
Popular posts from this blog
The internet is full of articles that will tell you why NZ is unique and what makes this beautiful country so special but like any other country, NZ has its own culture, work environment, specialties, positives, and challenges. Like any other country, if job seekers take things for granted or focus less on preparation or try to ignore the Kiwi ways the time taken to get what they want will be comparatively more than otherwise. To help you, the ‘job seekers’, I’ve listed down 6 statements that can be the deciding factor in helping you achieve your employment goals faster. You should know what are these statements, what they could mean for you and what sort of questions you should be asking to understand their effect/s on YOUR job search plans & execution strategies. Statement 1: The un advertised Job Market. Meaning: There's an open discussion on the internet that talks about the unadvertised job market. Some articles claim 80% of the jobs are not advertised and
So, you want to become an X?? Great, what next?? Thinking or dreaming about becoming X is ok but you know, just thinking and dreaming won’t be enough, you will have to do something more than that. This is where our two-step approach comes into the picture. The primary thing needed to become an X is to learn ‘how to become an X’ And the final step in learning how to become an X is To learn how to learn ‘how to become an X’. That’s it. It’s that simple. I’d say please go and learn it and keep doing it. Keep doing it, not once or twice…. Keep doing it till you get what you want. We are in 2017 and there are billions of resources available on the internet for learning anything and everything including job search. Blogs, articles, associations, experts, videos, webinars, eBooks. You just name it and these resources are all there on numerous social media platforms sharing their knowledge and expertise with you if you want. Remember, learn what’s ne
And so am I… In fact, all of us are assholes! Yup, I mean it. Now, before you start hurling aggressive comments towards me and pray that I rot in hell… hold your guns!! Let me try and explain what am I saying…ok? It so happened, that I met a job seeker couple of weeks back who felt recruiters are the lowest form of life on this face of the earth. They are a bunch of heartless dummies who are interested only in their commission. They don’t respond and they don’t feel the need to inform you about your rejection. They have no idea how it feels to get rejected, they are assholes. Understanding his frustration, I tried to reason with him for almost 30 minutes only to reach a conclusion that he felt even I am an asshole. (I mean, he didn’t say that out loud but I think I figured it out) He thought I was being defensive about how recruiters behave by justifying their actions. I didn’t support him and that was not what he was expecting or anticipating. I asked him some heavy hi